Guilt

Everyday I feel guilty that I didn't blog. 
I really want to be able to commit to sharing important, yet mundane, tidbits about my life because I think that many things would be useful to others. 

Kind of like a What would Jesus do?  Only Devon Style. 

But alas, commitment is hard.  After all, that is why there are so many people who live together without being married. 

And as I type each sentence, I am opening a can of worms.  So back to the guilt. 

I try not to let it consume me, because I already live my days wrapped up in so much commitment. 
I am committed to my husband.
I am committed to my three babies.  None of which are actually babies anymore. 

Tyson can remember and go through the steps to feed Dixie.  He is definitely not a baby.  He is one going on seven, and I cannot handle it. 

I am committed to feeding my children meals that are as healthy and wholesome as I can achieve on a limited time frame.  This is a whole separate blog post too I suppose. 

And frankly that may not seem like a lot of commitment, but when I go to bed each night thinking I didn't spend enough time with each of my kids, guilt creeps in there as well. 

So I will be making a list to backlog events that have occurred since August. 
Events will include, our beach vacation where my husband lost his wedding band.
Tyson's whole first year.
Meredith's adventures in ballet
Meredith's adventures in Kindergarten
Vomit 101  (because when you get married, no one tells you to see how good of a team you make with your husband when you have to deal with vomit)

I had a friend request a post on my thoughts on spanking - and how friends who spank can be friends with those who do not. 

Should you have any requests, please comment below.  I am like an open book.  You just have to ask the right questions :)

September 6

Today is September 6.
We signed up our kids to be able to do activities here on Fort Bragg after school. 

After we finished all the paper work, we were walking back to our car.  The weather is still quite warm, but you can tell there is a difference in the air.  A woman walked past me in jeans and a long sleeve polka dot denim shirt.

I immediately noted how I would never mix dark denim in that way, although I did really like her shirt.  I almost liked it enough to ask her where she got it, but with three kids in tow, it is hard enough to speak to strangers with a hello, much less awkward questions of "where do you shop". 

As I was lost in my thoughts of how I need to be better at speaking to others if I want to gain pertinent shopping information, I looked down and noticed my own outfit. 

I had been wearing it since this morning, which is a feat for me.  I often have to change my clothes because of my youngest messy machine.  Between his inability to accept appropriate table manners as a way of life, and his new love of blowing snot out of his nose, I am always covered in something. 
But today, I managed to wear the same clothes for the duration of the day. 

Unfortunately, it wasn't until this moment that I realized that I was wearing white shorts.  I had been wearing them for nearly nine hours, without giving them a second thought. 

I was immediately embarrassed!  White shorts?  It is September 6!  Labor Day had passed!  What kind of Southerner am I? 

Apparently moving to North Carolina did not help me to become "more" Southern.  I really am disappointed at myself. 

I hope you will forgive me. 

Worship Wednesday: Carry Me

We moved to Fort Bragg, North Carolina this summer. 
What a crazy whirlwind that was. 

Richard and I decided that we wanted to live on post here.   After living 40 minutes away from UVA and Charlottesville, we were not wanting Richard to spend so much time in the car each day.
The areas here in town are hit or miss, and we were recommended to live a similar distance away to be in a "good" area....unless we could live on post. 

We were offered a house on Fort Bragg that would be available around the same time that we needed it to be available.  This house is a duplex, so we are connected to another family.  We are much closer to our neighbors than we were in Palmyra, and some days even the Lake was too close to others.  Our house is a little smaller than our previous home, and we lost a ton of storage space - but we have managed.  My brother even claims the floor plan makes it appear we have more space in some rooms. 

We have spent the summer unpacking, getting organized and getting acclimated to the new area.  I still have nothing hanging on my walls, but we have put up some curtains and most things have found their new "home" or made it to the thrift store.

The area is way different than where we were living, in the middle of no where Virginia. 
We do enjoy being close to most modern conveniences.  We enjoy sending our children outside and allowing them to play and ride bikes without a worry. 

I still feel like we are unsettled, though. The past few months have flown by.  I have grown used to the sounds of artillery and helicopters and planes hovering overhead.  I have grown used to the piles of Army green socks and PT gear that had been packed away for years.
Two years is going to fly by at this rate! 

No worries, we will be carried through.  Without a doubt. 

And because it is Wednesday, here is a song for your viewing pleasure. 



Worship Wednesday: Starts with Me

 

 

 

I used to post my thoughts as Worship Wednesday when I blogged regularly.  I recently have had many stories that I desperately want to share with someone and to remember when my babies are older. 

 

Nine and a half months ago, I had a baby.  A baby, who is now 9 and a half months old.  The days have not been a blur like when Mere joined our family.  Tyson is the brightest light I have ever seen in a person.  And he is busy, and walking!   And three babies keep me busy, despite the fact that two of them are definitely not babies anymore.  I really feel like I am doing a disservice to them by not documenting events and milestones that are passing by like lightning.  As the days pass, I feel like I am in a time warp.  Not that I am not enjoying those moments with my children or wishing them away, but the time seems to escape me and we are so busy and engaged with things that two weeks have flashed by and I did not realize that another month has passed. 

 

We have been living in a new home for almost four months now.  The time passed seems insane to me, because I still feel new to the area.  I have always been slow to warm up to my surroundings, so perhaps that has something to do with it.  Regardless of that, I have sent my babies to school and I feel like the quiet makes my mind clearer. 

 

The constant noise and chatter makes things hard for me.  I am a total introvert.  I crave quiet and peace and serene like a person would crave chocolate or cheese.  So as my days continue, I will be able to write more.  I will share my thoughts.   So as we go forth, look forward to hearing from me more.   

 

I think this song is spectacular.  And I love it.  So happy Worship Wednesday. 

 

What can I do to leave a legacy?

How can I speak with authority if I can't see you?

How can I know the dreams you have me?

How do I believe beyond what I have seen?

If I can't hear you or I can't feel you now?

 

You're my revival song. 

You start where I belong.